To Grow Well
It is impossible to be human and not grow. We are shaped by our experiences and the people we encounter. But to grow well… Well, that is another matter. As a leader, executive coach and business owner, I have spent much of my life mentoring and coaching others. What I have learned from working with or observing these exceptional “growers” is that they tend to do the following three things:
- They believe that the impossible is in fact possible. Whether they have a rock-solid faith in God, or in their ability to somehow, someway make something happen, the best growers don’t put their dreams, their mission, or their calling in the “That’s Impossible” category. If they feel that they are meant to do something, they start down the path one step at a time, recognizing that the person they are today may not know all the right things to get them to where they want to go; however, they are patient enough and courageous enough to recognize that they can grow into the person who is.
- They never, ever, ever do it by themselves. These individuals consistently surround themselves with people who can add value. They aren’t afraid to ask stupid questions and they seek the right advice – if they need to make a decision, they ask for input from individuals who will be affected by their decisions. They believe that information informs, and they aren’t scared of what they will learn in the process of gleaning it. They also have small and wide circles of friends. The individuals that they let into their small circle are not Pollyanna’s, but they also aren’t negative Nancy’s. They are encouragers, faith partners, and optimists at heart. Simply put, greater learners don’t let “can’t do” types of people get too close to them.
- They give themselves grace. Grace to fail and to try something new. Grace to take a vacation and time off. They have the ability to use an outcome they didn’t want or didn’t foresee as an opportunity to learn. They don’t allow disappointment, or setbacks or success to become part of their identity. That recognize that outcomes are a piece of the process of shaping them into the person they want to be, and that they are not defined by their outcomes. They also recognize that to grow well means embracing the ebb and flow of seasons of life. That rest often precedes breakthrough, and that a highly stressed individual is like a sponge full to the capacity with water – it simply cannot absorb more. So, they allow themselves time to rest so that in the long run they can absorb more.
To grow, yes, we all grow. But to grow well. Well, that take practice and intention, and I hope that learning about the habits of people who grow well will inspire you on your own journey.
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